Make Love An Art

All photos by Fiona Conrad

 What better person to turn to on this day than the man that dedicated his life to the study of love, Dr. Leo Buscaglia. I only wish I could have taken his course entitled, "Love 1A", that he taught for many years at University of Southern California! 

Here are a few inspirational thoughts about love by "Dr. Love", Leo Buscaglia:

Love makes us more

"Love encourages us to venture into places in our minds and hearts never before explored and which would never have been disclosed except for love. In essence, love reveals us to ourselves.

In love we find the security which encourages us to risk, to try again, to find new behavioral alternatives for old ways. We more deeply discover ourselves as we discover each other. From lovers we are presented with a new vision, a realization that the world we have defined for ourselves may have been delimiting and we are encouraged to open up to new perceptions made possible only through someone else's vision. 

Love offers us the most fertile soil for growth. We nurture that soil by enriching it with a willingness to give up our old self and our useless preconceptions. In return, we are presented with a broader vision of ourselves and a world of limitless possibilities for our discovery. Love is not blind. It has perfect vision. It makes it possible for us to see as we have never seen before." - Leo Buscaglia, Born for Love

Make love an art

"Many of us have an armchair view of love. We create a fixed, comfortable parameter for our feelings and sit back safely within these self-imposed limits. We don't go to love, we expect it to come to us. We look to novels, movies and television to bring us to love vicariously, content to be passive observers. We are fearful of emotions that make demands on us, that can possibly get out of hand. 

Love is not known to thrive in such an atmosphere. Real lovers do more than just seek the comfort of love, they strive to make it an art. They are fully aware that this will require a continuous expanding of their senses and sharpening of their perceptions in order to keep up with the challenges of love.

Love is a vast canvas awaiting out artistic expression. The work is never really completed, it's always a work in progress. But as with all creative endeavors, as we labor, we are treated to a broader vision, a keener insight, and the joy that comes mainly from the artistic process itself, less concerned with critical judgment and the finished master-piece." 
- Leo Buscaglia, Born for Love

 My own thoughts...

How do you define something so intangible? I don't believe it's possible for any love to be exactly alike. I guess the best thing I can say about love is that I am living in the love that I've always wanted and dreamt of, the love that I've created (and often times beyond what I thought was possible), and that's the best love anyone could hope to live in, the love that personally suits them the very best. Yet, my feelings on love are constantly changing and evolving as I grow older and experience more of life, for me the beauty is in the constant push and pull of love, the give and take, and the anticipation of each other's needs. I make an effort to always be in touch with my own feelings, so that I can make them known. My experience with all different kinds of love has lead me to truly understand the love that I want to give and receive so freely. For me personally, this journey and reward has been the holy grail of happiness.

On a very basic level love begins with two beings just simply being nice to one another. I know this may sound elementary, but not everyone is nice and/or sincere, and love can never grow in that environment.  

Love is as complex as trying to understand the universe. We can talk about it until we're blue in the face, but does anyone really know what's going on out there in space, especially outside our galaxy??! The same goes for trying to understand a human relationship, the complexities are limitless.

All we know is that we need love, we need it to survive. We long for it. Everyone wants to love and be loved...and everyone deserves the love that they desire. 

A day spent without having completed an act of love is a day lost

"We all have so many possible occasions for loving and yet there is so little demonstrated love in the wolrd. People are dying alone, crying alone. Children are being abused and elderly people are spending their final days without tenderness and love. In a world where there is such an obvious need for demonstrated love, it is well to realize the enormous power we do have to help and to heal people in our lives with nothing more complicated than an outsteched hand or a warm hug. Teresa of Avila entreated us to "accustom yourself to make many acts of love, for they enkindle and melt the soul."

Day's end is a good time to reflect on what we have done to make the world a better, more caring and loving place. If nothing springs to mind night after night, this can also be an excellent time for us to consider how we can change the world for the better. We need not perform monumental acts, but act on the simple things which are readily accomplished: the phone call we have not made, that note we have put off writing, that kindness we have failed to acknowledge. When it comes to giving love, the opportunities are unlimited and we are all gifted." - Leo Buscaglia, Born for Love

" There is the same difference in a person before and after he is in love, as there is in an unlighted lamp and one that is burning. The lamp was there and was a good lamp, but now it is shedding light too (and this is its real function)."

- Vincent Van Gogh